Invitation to connect on LinkedIn
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From Dan Coffey
I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.
– Dan
Confirm that you know Dan
Personal Hot Spots
What is the hottest spot on the body?
———- from Tina Smith of Sunderland, MA
It depends on the body. Charro, the original South American go-go girl runs a constant temperature of 106.9 on all parts of petite yet energetic frame. The late Neville Chamberlain, on the other hand, was clammy to the touch no matter what the temperature was outside. Some researchers think it may have to do with how much selenium we consume. Charro was reported to subsist on almost a pure selenium diet, where the greasy fish and chips eaten by Chamberlain were well-nigh selenium-free. Back when I used to do simple scholarly research, I participated in a study that attempted to link body temperature with viewing of daytime television, but either we established no correlation or nobody cared, I can’t remember which.
It depends on the body. Charro, the original South American go-go girl runs a constant temperature of 106.9 on all parts of petite yet energetic frame. The late Neville Chamberlain, on the other hand, was clammy to the touch no matter what the temperature was outside. Some researchers think it may have to do with how much selenium we consume. Charro was reported to subsist on almost a pure selenium diet, where the greasy fish and chips eaten by Chamberlain were well-nigh selenium-free. Back when I used to do simple scholarly research, I participated in a study that attempted to link body temperature with viewing of daytime television, but either we established no correlation or nobody cared, I can’t remember which. Dr. Science’s Beard
What kind of creatures live in your beard?
———- from Betty Lou Brown of Boonk, KY
It varies. Sometimes they’re just simple paramecia, although every now and then an amebic colony makes its home in my facial upholstery. I used to try to keep a sterile environment under that masculine rug, but soon gave up fighting a losing battle and simply made my visitors welcome, provided they stayed out of my mouth and nasal orifices. Once, after an especially long nap, I awoke to find a family of ferrets nesting just below my chin. Having had some unpleasant experiences with wild ferrets, I knew that it would be best to move very slowly until I could submerge my entire head in a bath of liquid fluorine. That took care of them, and my beard has had a pleasant greenish tinge ever since.
It varies. Sometimes they’re just simple paramecia, although every now and then an amebic colony makes its home in my facial upholstery. I used to try to keep a sterile environment under that masculine rug, but soon gave up fighting a losing battle and simply made my visitors welcome, provided they stayed out of my mouth and nasal orifices. Once, after an especially long nap, I awoke to find a family of ferrets nesting just below my chin. Having had some unpleasant experiences with wild ferrets, I knew that it would be best to move very slowly until I could submerge my entire head in a bath of liquid fluorine. That took care of them, and my beard has had a pleasant greenish tinge ever since. The Nixon in All of Us
Why do I keep finding Richard Nixon in my closet? isn’t he supposed to be dead or something?
———- from James Rose of Kalispell, MT
Jungian psychology posits the existence of a shadow side, where everything we would rather wish away not only exists, but colors our every perception. For many of us, the personification of that shadow self is most completely found in the infamous celebrity persona of Nixon. There’s no use denying the Nixon in all of us – in fact to do so is to make it all the more real. No, it is only by accepting our Nixoness that we can transcend it. Next time you see Nixon in your closet, flash him the old twin victory signs and then do as Sammy Davis Jr. did, and hug him. He’ll disappear faster than an IRS refund.
Jungian psychology posits the existence of a shadow side, where everything we would rather wish away not only exists, but colors our every perception. For many of us, the personification of that shadow self is most completely found in the infamous celebrity persona of Nixon. There’s no use denying the Nixon in all of us – in fact to do so is to make it all the more real. No, it is only by accepting our Nixoness that we can transcend it. Next time you see Nixon in your closet, flash him the old twin victory signs and then do as Sammy Davis Jr. did, and hug him. He’ll disappear faster than an IRS refund. Shave Itches
Why does it itch after you shave?
———- from Paul Mulroyan of Melbourne, Australia
Back when I let societal pressure force me into that most unnatural act of scraping a sliver of sharpened steel across my face, I used to suffer from nicks, scrapes, gushing wounds and random itching. Then I got smart. I applied a gel of hydrogen fluoride to my face, and when I regained consciousness, my beard, as well as most of my face, were nowhere to be found. In due time, silicon implants gave me a new face, and a single filament of the miracle fiber Dynel gave me the crisp, glistening beard I sport today. No sir, you couldn’t bribe me into shaving. I’ve evolved beyond it.
Back when I let societal pressure force me into that most unnatural act of scraping a sliver of sharpened steel across my face, I used to suffer from nicks, scrapes, gushing wounds and random itching. Then I got smart. I applied a gel of hydrogen fluoride to my face, and when I regained consciousness, my beard, as well as most of my face, were nowhere to be found. In due time, silicon implants gave me a new face, and a single filament of the miracle fiber Dynel gave me the crisp, glistening beard I sport today. No sir, you couldn’t bribe me into shaving. I’ve evolved beyond it. 