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UFO Inquiry
Posted by Dr. Science on 06/30/2014
What do you call a UFO after it has landed?
———- from Ken Armstrong of Gloucester, Ontario, Canada
A “big honker”, or a “what in the heck is that?” Contrary to popular belief, the IFO, or Identified Flying Object is simply a weather balloon or a top secret experimental aircraft. There is no conspiracy by the Federal Government to deceive us about the nature of these things. But the UFO is truly unidentified, which is a fancy way of saying “no one knows what it is.” Your guess is as good as mine. I guess I’d favor the belief that they are concrete manifestations of our collective unconscious. That might explain the one I once saw in Wisconsin that looked like a giant, inflated Ross Perot.
A “big honker”, or a “what in the heck is that?” Contrary to popular belief, the IFO, or Identified Flying Object is simply a weather balloon or a top secret experimental aircraft. There is no conspiracy by the Federal Government to deceive us about the nature of these things. But the UFO is truly unidentified, which is a fancy way of saying “no one knows what it is.” Your guess is as good as mine. I guess I’d favor the belief that they are concrete manifestations of our collective unconscious. That might explain the one I once saw in Wisconsin that looked like a giant, inflated Ross Perot. Horn Sucking
Posted by Dr. Science on 06/27/2014
If I put my car battery in backwards, will the horn suck?
———- from Bill Wells of Charlotte, NC
Yes, and it could very well be a viable form of propulsion, albeit a noisy one. The Soviet Scientist Sergei Maschinovskii, called the “Father of the Russian Truck” devised a large vehicle that gulped air into a funnel mounted on the hood, and expelled it noisily out the rear. He called it the Great Flatulator, and hundreds of thousands were manufactured and sold behind the iron curtain. You could hear one coming a mile away, which inadvertently contributed to its high safety rating. No one ever failed to know when a Flatulator was near.
Yes, and it could very well be a viable form of propulsion, albeit a noisy one. The Soviet Scientist Sergei Maschinovskii, called the “Father of the Russian Truck” devised a large vehicle that gulped air into a funnel mounted on the hood, and expelled it noisily out the rear. He called it the Great Flatulator, and hundreds of thousands were manufactured and sold behind the iron curtain. You could hear one coming a mile away, which inadvertently contributed to its high safety rating. No one ever failed to know when a Flatulator was near. The Taste of Dirt
Posted by Dr. Science on 06/25/2014
Why does dirt taste bad, even after you put ketchup on it?
———- from Jerry Carr Jr. of M.I.T, Boston, MA
First of all, I’d like to compliment you on your dedication to research. Many a scientist would have hired students on work study to taste dirt for him. But you’re not afraid to get right down on all fours, ketchup bottle in one hand, spoon in the other. You’ve got the makings of a real scientist. On the other hand, you may be entirely unsuited for modern life. The last people to voluntarily eat dirt were Neanderthals, and they became extinct almost a million years ago. So there’s a possibility you could be both a scientist and a Neanderthal, which, come to think of it, wouldn’t be that unusual.
First of all, I’d like to compliment you on your dedication to research. Many a scientist would have hired students on work study to taste dirt for him. But you’re not afraid to get right down on all fours, ketchup bottle in one hand, spoon in the other. You’ve got the makings of a real scientist. On the other hand, you may be entirely unsuited for modern life. The last people to voluntarily eat dirt were Neanderthals, and they became extinct almost a million years ago. So there’s a possibility you could be both a scientist and a Neanderthal, which, come to think of it, wouldn’t be that unusual. The End of Films
Posted by Dr. Science on 06/23/2014
How do movies always manage to finish by the time “The End” flashes on the screen?
———- from Peque Gallaga of Manila, Philippines
It takes the highly synchronized work of hundreds of diligent technicians, from the gaffer to the best boy, to make such a thing come about. On low budget movies, or those made by Ed Wood, often the ending credit will come halfway through the film. In other cases, the credits will interrupt the climax, and the movie may begin with closing credit. Especially in countries with repressive governments, docile audience members may file out of the theater at that time, thus missing the whole show. So the next time you see “The End” flash on the screen, take note of where you are when you see it, and what kind of movie it is.
It takes the highly synchronized work of hundreds of diligent technicians, from the gaffer to the best boy, to make such a thing come about. On low budget movies, or those made by Ed Wood, often the ending credit will come halfway through the film. In other cases, the credits will interrupt the climax, and the movie may begin with closing credit. Especially in countries with repressive governments, docile audience members may file out of the theater at that time, thus missing the whole show. So the next time you see “The End” flash on the screen, take note of where you are when you see it, and what kind of movie it is. Transformer Secrets
Posted by Dr. Science on 06/20/2014
Tell me the secret of the transformers.
———- from Patricia Kelly of Derry, Ireland
If I were to disclose that, the Power Rangers would swoop down from wherever they hang out and hang me out to dry. From the tone and content of your question, I would guess that you’re either a child or an imbecile. In either case, rest assured that there is no answer that could satisfy your curiosity in this case. You may, however, be referring to the transformation of alternating current, a process detailed and analyzed by Tesla, Hertz and Westinghouse. In that case, I can simply say, you can have either high amperage or high voltage, but not both for a given wattage. There, hope that helps.
If I were to disclose that, the Power Rangers would swoop down from wherever they hang out and hang me out to dry. From the tone and content of your question, I would guess that you’re either a child or an imbecile. In either case, rest assured that there is no answer that could satisfy your curiosity in this case. You may, however, be referring to the transformation of alternating current, a process detailed and analyzed by Tesla, Hertz and Westinghouse. In that case, I can simply say, you can have either high amperage or high voltage, but not both for a given wattage. There, hope that helps. 