TV Effects on Family

  My children have a theory that housework, lawn mowing, dusting, and dish cleaning gets done by their watching television. I’m confused. Do such televisions exist that actually do household work while people watch shows?

———- from Bob Campagna of Mt. Vernon, IA

  Your children are not your children. They are an expression of the television’s longing for your family. Face facts, the television is far better at attracting and holding your children’s attention than you are. Why not just sign custody over to the boob tube, and get on with your life? These little tasks and distractions you have set up for yourself to fill the inner void left by the absence of your family will do nothing to really assuage your fears of abandonment. All the housework in the world won’t enable you to “get a life.” Your children have found their real family in the Jetsons and the Simpsons. Now you need to find yours.

Male Correction

If a man is talking in the forest, and there isn’t a woman there to correct him, is he still wrong?

--- Here's the answer from Dr. Science