Banana Slug Spirits
Why is it when I kiss a banana slug my lips sometimes stick together?
———- from Sallie Greenthumb of Lake Oswego, OR
No matter how overwhelmed with affection you become, you must never kiss a banana slug. It’s dangerous for you: a near-sighted slug may mistake your tongue for a fellow creature and fall in love with it. And it’s dangerous for the slug. The banana slug is a free spirit, sort of like that touring folksinger we all once “knew.” It comes in the night, goes with the wind, it can never be tamed or possessed. Kissing a banana slug only creates a false sense of dependency. A slug cannot be tied down and must forever roam free. If you haven’t obtained your free copy of “The Banana Slug Owner’s Handbook” from the SPCA, I urge you to do so. Unless you have the right attitude, your banana slug – with or without guitar – will break your heart.
No matter how overwhelmed with affection you become, you must never kiss a banana slug. It’s dangerous for you: a near-sighted slug may mistake your tongue for a fellow creature and fall in love with it. And it’s dangerous for the slug. The banana slug is a free spirit, sort of like that touring folksinger we all once “knew.” It comes in the night, goes with the wind, it can never be tamed or possessed. Kissing a banana slug only creates a false sense of dependency. A slug cannot be tied down and must forever roam free. If you haven’t obtained your free copy of “The Banana Slug Owner’s Handbook” from the SPCA, I urge you to do so. Unless you have the right attitude, your banana slug – with or without guitar – will break your heart. 