Grizzly Bear Habits
Why do grizzly bears in Wyoming and Montana only eat non-residents? Virtually no citizen in our two states has ever been eaten – just non-residents!
———- from Alan B. of rural Montana
This is a problem that baffles science and causes a park ranger’s hair to turn gray overnight. There seems to be something about a vacation that causes the IQ to drop about 20 points. A mysterious urge comes over the tourist to pose with the grizzly bear – even, so I’ve heard, putting young children on the backs of bears or feeding bears by hand from picnic baskets. Through what science calls the Yogi Bear Syndrome, tourists with full cable television access apparently come to believe that a grizzly bear is “cute.” How a smelly half-ton of lumbering fur, teeth and claws can be thought cute is, indeed, a mystery. – thank goodness cable television has been banned in Wyoming and Montana. I recommend banning reruns of those Hanna Barbara shows; it might not clear up the problem, but both the park service and our nation’s airwaves would probably be grateful.
This is a problem that baffles science and causes a park ranger’s hair to turn gray overnight. There seems to be something about a vacation that causes the IQ to drop about 20 points. A mysterious urge comes over the tourist to pose with the grizzly bear – even, so I’ve heard, putting young children on the backs of bears or feeding bears by hand from picnic baskets. Through what science calls the Yogi Bear Syndrome, tourists with full cable television access apparently come to believe that a grizzly bear is “cute.” How a smelly half-ton of lumbering fur, teeth and claws can be thought cute is, indeed, a mystery. – thank goodness cable television has been banned in Wyoming and Montana. I recommend banning reruns of those Hanna Barbara shows; it might not clear up the problem, but both the park service and our nation’s airwaves would probably be grateful. 